Archive for March, 2007

Be Our Guest…

March 30, 2007 · Filed under Wedding/Marriage

While weddings (in particular Luke and mine) are times to celebrate and be happy, not everything in the lead up to them is easy.

One of the things on my mind is people to invite. Because my fiancé and I  are having our ceremony and reception in the one place it’s difficult to just invite people to the wedding and not the reception.

Do you invite people who you were once friends with for prosperities sake? Or do you just go with the people that you are friends with at the current time, and plan on being friends with in the future?

I guess costs come into it. We don’t have a big wedding planned. We have a reasonable amount of money, but would rather save some and go to Phuket for our honeymoon. We’re looking at an 80 head count. For people who don’t know much about weddings they think that’s a lot. My friend is having about 150 to hers, and another wanted about 300 originally. That’s a big wedding. Ours could easily be big, but that’s not really the theme. 80 covers our extended families and a few friends- and not even all of our extended families…

Part of me wouldn’t mind if it were just Luke, I, our immediate families and our pastor. The other part of me wants to share this beautiful day with everyone.

People are starting (what am I talking about, they’ve been doing it ever since we announced we were engaged) to boss me around. I don’t like it. I have ideas and thoughts and I want to do what I want to do. It’s our wedding, not theirs.

I don’t know quite why I’m writing this. Maybe just to get people’s thoughts on weddings guests and costs and themes… my mind is boggled with it all, and I have Uni and work and Prac and friends and church and family all boggled in there too. It gets a little confusing.

I think it’s important to remember that it’s OUR wedding. Luke and mine. I can’t just do what I want, and so that goes with guests- both numbers and names, times, locations, attire… everything (except I got to do the dress just me and mum!). It’s an US thing. Really our first official ‘us’ thing, and so we have to do it together I think, to do it right.

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Magic

March 28, 2007 · Filed under All About Me, Reflective

Have I ever told you about my magic powers? I have written about how the universe returns things to me, which is a similar type of thing. It’s similar in that I think it’s about being ‘one’ with the universe. Not in a heathen sense (as I am a christian) but in a.. me sense! Haha.

Sometimes I can feel luck around me, and I use it. A good example of it is when Luke and I were in Melbourne. We went to the casino one night, and found a game that was only $10 a bet. We’d never played it before. It was called Casino War and it was VERY easy to pick up on.

So we started to play. Usually Luke plays when we’re at the casino, but I played this time because I wanted a go. So I started playing and I am getting these really good cards. You just have to get a higher card then the dealer. I lost a few hands, but after only playing $20 at the start and then making $50 we decided to put in another $50. So I had a $70 initial layout, and after playing for ages and having heaps of fun and just getting ridiculously good hands ALL the time (bar a few losses) we decided to call it quits. It was fun though, and I could still FEEL the luck running through me, so we kept playing and left the table with $220. Pretty good, yeah?

The reason we left was because of this. I went cold, my smile left me (I didn’t mean for it to), and I just KNEW that the game had ended. I said to Luke that this was the last round, and though he tried to get me to play more I insisted that that was the end. We left the table with that $220.

I had played the whole night and so Luke wanted a go. He took $20, and even though I knew the game was up, he played. We lost the $20. I guess for me that was proof that I had listened to the feeling accurately. I don’t blame Luke for trying at all, it’s what I would have wanted to do in his situation as well. But that’s just one example. There are many more, for another time. But here’s a quicky for the road: I can guess the colour that my clinker will be. And sometimes I can guess the suit of the next card in a deck. Not high probability guessing I know, but that’s not the point, the point is that I just KNOW. Like I 100% know, I would be able to bet money, or a life on it I am so sure.

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Rubbish Freak

March 28, 2007 · Filed under All About Me, The World

I know this might sound repetitive, but Worpress sucks. It keeps losing my post and I have to retype them. I will not make the same mistake again though, I will copy the post BEFORE I hit publish, then if it doesn’t do it properly I won’t have to type this all out again.

Before I wrote this title I knew what I was going to write about, and then as soon as I had written it I thought of something else that I could write there. Anyway, the original thing that I was going to write (and did write before this thing was so stupid…) was that I love mess.

My room at the moment is COVERED in mess. It is a pig sty. The other day I was looking for a receipt and so I emptied everything in my room that had paper in it. It was messy before, but just an annoying messy- not messy enough. I needed it to be more messy, more like it is now- just a complete shambles, for it to be a ‘good’ mess.

You may be wondering how more mess is a good mess, so let me explain. I’m a freak. I love the mess. The mess makes me EXCITED because I know that I get to clean it.

…

…

…

Freak. I know. I realised this about myself as I was in the car tonight waiting for my cell group to start. My car is also the biggest mess in the world, and so I decided to clean it all up. I loved getting in there and cleaning it and making it all nice again. I saved the yucky sticky bits till another day, one because they’re the best bits, and two because I didn’t have anything to clean it with.

So I guess you’re wondering what the second thing was. Actual rubbish. I pick rubbish of the ground that isn’t mine and I HATE littering. I love recycling, and I am in the process of recycling my own paper at the moment. I will post a ‘how to’ on Talia’s Blog when I get round to it. Speaking of how to’s, and of Talia’s Blog, I wrote an article there once about saving the world. It’s about picking up rubbish etc.

I’ve been picking up rubbish for a while now, I did when I was in high school (about 3 or 4 years ago now) and I have always been aware of putting things in the bin. It’s lazy not to, so do the right thing.

So tell me about your freaky things. Am I alone is this strange love to clean up piles of mess, but HATE to clean up little, stupid messes? I hate almost anything little, I like big… everything (without being sus). An example is I don’t like little pretend hugs, I like big, proper hugs. Another example is I don’t like little explanations of things, I like BIG explanations, stories even.  Yet another example is that I don’t like small amount of time with my fiance, only big amounts of time. That’s not entirely true, I will take any time I can get, but big time is preferable!

So tell me that I’m not alone, OR tell me that you have something equally as freakish to share.

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Presonal Resiliency Builders

March 26, 2007 · Filed under All About Me, Uni

How are YOU resilient? Here is a list of personal resiliency builders, read this list, and identify three or four strategies that you use to be resilient.

Relationships-Sociability/ability to be a friend/ability to form positive relationships

Humour- Has a good sense of humour

Inner Direction- Bases choices/decisions on internal evaluation (internal focus on control)

Perceptiveness- Insightful understanding of people and situations

Independence- “Adaptive” distancing from unhealthy people and situations

Positive View of Personal Future- Optimism; expects a positive future

Flexibility- Can adjust to change; can bend as necessary to positively cope with a situation

Love of Learning- Capacity for and connection to learning

Self-motivation- Internal initiative and positive motivation from within

Competence- Is “good at something”/ personal competence

Self-Worth- Feelings of self-worth and self-confidence

Spirituality- Personal faith in something greater

Perseverance- Keeps on despite difficulty; doesn’t give up

Creativity- Expresses self through artistic endeavour

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Lately Luke

March 22, 2007 · Filed under Luke

Lately, since Luke has moved, I have been reading his past journals (don’t worry, I have permission!). It’s interesting because he talks in one of them about how he likes dressing in dress shirts and smart pants and leather shoes- like it’s something different to what he usually wears or has worn in the past. I thought this was a little strange when I read it, and I realise that apart from the dream of a few months back in 2005 when we spent every day together and sat at Hungry Jacks and went to COC and had no money, I have always known as a man who worked in the city and wore those clothes.

I noticed this, but in a different way, the other day. Luke just abruptly said that he couldn’t belive that he wasn’t in a musical at the moment. He had been in them his whole life he said and it was so strange for him to not be in one now.
I nodded and took it in, and thought about how his parents frequently ask him if he’s in a muscial at the moment or where some auditions are. I KNEW that he was always in musicals, but I guess it never clicked that he was ALWAYS in musicals. You know? I just thought that they were a hobby, like me and… painting maybe? Something that’s always on my mind and something that I love, but not something that I spend a majority of my year, or even my time, on. Maybe that’s a wrong analagy…

Anyway, so I was thinking about this and I realised that I am knew to Luke’s life. I have changed him. Have I? Or did he change himself? Good changes. But are some bad? Have I stolen some part of him, some of his love? Musicals, music- things he use to love but no longer have time for? Because of me? Just questions, but questions all the same.

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It’s All Relative

March 22, 2007 · Filed under Luke, Reflective

Where I live at the moment, on the Sunshine Coast, I am 10-20 minutes away from everything. I do have a local shop and petrol station, but my woollies, hairdressers and things like that are about 10 away. I can go to nearly any suburb area on the Sunshine Coast, no more north than coolum in 20 minutes max. So a little drive isn’t something I’m foreign to, especially since I’ve been living there for the last 20 years.

Where my fiance has just moved to we are quite close to a large supermarket. In fact, we’re almost right on the main road going into the city, and the whole road is lined with a variety of shops that could fufill any need we have. Now, becuase we are so close now to shops- a five minute walk, or a one or two minute car trip, we are tending to be far less likely to go down the road. I wonder why NOW, now that I am so close to shops, the shopping center 10 minutes away seems like such a long drive. The one ten minutes down the road has better shops. It’s a Woolworths instead of Coles, there are targets, Big W’s, K-Marts, and hundreds of speciality stores.

I think that I am going to make the effort to go that little bit further when I move in in October. As I was driving here this morning I saw a little fruit shed, me, not being that keen on supermarket fruit and veges, will definitely have to check it out as a place to by mine in the future.

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Circle Of Courage

March 22, 2007 · Filed under All About Me, Uni

Circle Of Courage

http://www.poughkeepsieschools.org/pages/students/activity/images/circle_logo.gif

BELONGING: Where do you belong? Social groups, people etc.

Luke, Rhys, Hayden, Amon, Mum, Dad, Nana, Misty. My extend family, cell group, uni group.

  • We are all together to accept and encourage one another.
  • Mutual respect in the classroom.
  • Treat the class as your family. Work Together.

MASTERY: What are you good at? What have you achieved?

Finished two years of Uni so far! Made positive decisions with my relationship with Luke, learning about myself, ability with computers, sold a painting, blogging…

  • Strive for PERSONAL reasons, not to be better then others.
  • More successful people should be role models for learning, not rivals.
  • Observe those with more expereience to learn from them.
  • Acknowledge others achievements and look up to them if they’re better then you.

INDEPENDENCE: When do you feel most confident and strong?

When I’m thin, happy and smiling, motherly, caring/loving, stylish, individual, noticed by strangers.

  • Build respect and inner discipline.
  • From a young age foster decision making, problem solving and show personal responsibility.
  • Sometimes we are to warm and fuzzy- to quick to solve a child’s problem and not giving them an opportunity to solve it themselves.
  • Do we help and save our students to early?

GENEROSITY: What generous thing have you done in the last 24 hours?
Stayed at Luke’s so that he could get the internet installed and plumber (IF the plumber comes…), invited Solo to cell, made everyone at cell some yummy talias, woke up early for Luke so that I could drive him to the train station.

  • When you get something good, share it straight away.
  • make a positive contribution to another human life.

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Fire Twirling Stick Bag

March 20, 2007 · Filed under Creative

Tonight I just made a bag for Luke and my fire twirling sticks to fit into. It’s pretty nifty.

I made it out of a pair of old jeans- the legs at least, and I use the top part (with the fly and the pockets etc) to make a bag. So I made the FT bag, and put velcro at the top to seal it so that it didn’t get rained on, and made a handle. I am about to go and decorate it now- with a sharpie (a black, thin pointed permanent marker). I heart sharpies.

I know that I really should be better with posting photos on my blog etc., but I’m just to lazy. Maybe if you ask me nicely I will…

Also, don’t think that I am just a slack blogger and don’t update my blog very regularly. I have three that I run,

http://87purpleelphants.com/blog

http://87purpleelphants.com/teachingtalia

and this one: http://87purpleelphants.com/taliaslife

So between the three of them I do update daily, sometimes more then that, and sometimes a little less then that. So check out those ones to find out what else I’m up to!

Got any suggestions for other cool things I could make with jeans? Comment away. For those of you that don’t know, I’m a bag maker- I use lots of different stuff though to make them, and they’re mostly handbags, and bigger Unisex bags. Again, if you want to see them, or want one then give me a holler and I’ll get to it. I like to please the audience…

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Now and The Future

March 19, 2007 · Filed under All About Me

I am really into self improvement and self awareness and all that. The risk with self improvement is that you get so caught up with the negative things about yourself that you have to change that you forget about the good things. That’s why it’s important to start with a list (5 is sufficient) of all the things you’re good at, and then move on to the bad things sorry, things you need to improve. ;-)

Another precaution with the ‘things to improve’ is that you don’t make a list of five ‘unreachable’ goals. If you are a short person then don’t aim to be taller. It’s not going to happen. If you have big things that you need to put on there like maybe anger issues, alcoholism or a gambling addiction then it’s important that you only put ONE of those one, even if there’s more then one. The purpose of this exercise isn’t to make you feel shitty about yourself, but to help you make positive changes in your life to improve. So try to have one or two smaller goals that you can achieve in the next month or two. Things that just take a little more effort then you’re giving them at the moment, not entire life changes. So why don’t you have a go once you’ve had a look at mine, post it on your blog and then send me the the link so that we can all share this with each other!
5 Things I Like/ Am Good At:

  1. Art. Visual art to be exact, but most creative things.
  2. Making lists. I know this sounds like a bit of a trivial one, but I am actually good at making really long lists of things that people never would have thought of before.
  3. I think I’m okay at organising things. I LIKE organising things at least, which fits into at least half the criteria.
  4. Looking after people. Playing mum. Being sympathetic. Knowing things that mum’s know. That kind of thing I think I’ve got a bit of a thing for.
  5. Self-Help. Mostly ’cause I like it, but I also just genuinely like helping myself. I like thinking of ways to improve and do better. I guess that’s actually why I am writing this blog, and also why I am writing the next section:

5 Things I Need/ Want To Improve On:

  1. Be a better geek. I know it sounds odd for some people who have known me for a while- like a few years. But if you’ve known me for longer then that (Rhys) then you’ll realise that it’s not so weird. Super hero games anyone?!
  2. Happier. I read a blog called the happiness project, and that is really great for ideas to stay positive etc. Sometimes I let things bug me and get me down, and I need to try and keep things more in perspective. An example? When people hurt me by accident not yelling and screaming but just sitting calmly and realising that it was an accident, and while it’s okay for me to cry and be upset, I can’t blame them. If they did it again then it would be their fault, but while it’s just an accident, it’s an accident. Sounds like resilience…
  3. More self control. When I say I’m not going to do something (like eat that piece of chocolate) then NOT DO IT. It’s a hard one, and a struggle I realise not everyone goes though, but it’s a toughie for me.
  4. Make more time to read/prioritise. I need to work out what’s important to me, and focus on that. I said make more time to read, because I like reading and I rarely have time for it. I am convinced however that if I didn’t waste so much time on the internet doing nothing then I WOULD have time to read. All well. As far as that goes I should really make the effort to read my BIBLE more, as that it is one of the most important things, and pray of course. And I should spend more time with my family, and work some more so I can afford to go see Luke more. And I should catch up with my friends more, and I should see Nana more… I think it’s interesting that all these things that I need to make more time for are people. Hmm… interesting.
  5. Stop being jealous. Although I am getting better I still have issues with jealousy and such. I need to stop. It’s ridiculous when I know I have no reason to be jealous because my fiancé loves me more then anything. I think it has a little to do with self confidence, and stresses in life at the current time. Like if I’m really stressed about something, say Uni, then Luke going out will make me more jealous then if things were really good for me and I was at peace. You know what I mean?

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When The Universe Returns Things To Me

March 18, 2007 · Filed under All About Me

A few weeks ago I used my digital camera and put it somewhere I couldn’t remember. About a week ago I thought that I should take some photos, but my camera wasn’t there.

Did I worry about it? No. Did I stress about it? No. Did I even look for it frantically? No. What help would any of those things be? It wasn’t LOST, I just couldn’t find it, and that was fine. I KNEW that I would find it because I had to have put it somewhere, right? Right.

Anyway, so I often think like this and I realise that it’s this ‘one-ness’ with the universe that allows things to be brought back to me. I know it sounds weird, and I haven’t really explained it fully, but the purpose of the story is to not worry about loosing things and say that you’ve lost them. You should just accept that it’s gone for the moment and when the time is right it will be returned to you.

Needless to say that my digital camera was returned to me just the other day. Told you.

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